Habs vs Coyotes Top Six Minutes: Caufield shines, tank shines brighter

Pre-Game Thoughts

• I don’t know if it’s the Daylight Savings, the covid recovery, or just general nonsense but I feel like this 7pm start is actually like a 10pm start.
• But that’s why God created caffeine right?
• Also no Chiarot, no Poehling, no Anderson, it’s a real Laval Rocket looking lineup in Montreal tonight.
• Who is ready for Tank Bowl part deux? Hopefully it’s more entertaining than the last one!

First Period

• Dear god Joel Armia what are you doing man.
• Why the hell was the ref in Jeff Petry’s path there? Come on man.
• Mathieu Perreault with the slowest breakaway chance in quite some time.
• And it’s 2-0 Coyotes, and it’s worth pointing out that Arizona played last night and are intentionally bad, figure it out fellas.
• This power play has been equal parts horrifying and then electrifying which might be progress after the Seattle game?
• Rough start, but Montreal has started to look much more put together since the second goal...Score a goal fellas!
• Somehow that goal is exactly what I expected the Habs first one to look like, but I’ll take it!
• Boy, there’s been a lot of Habs wiping out in the Arizona crease tonight eh?
• In Joel Edmundson’s defence, the last time he played that cross-check wasn’t a penalty.
• I was so excited to compliment a good penalty kill, and then they got scored on.
• Ah well, a great period for the tank!
• And then Arizona scores again, and now I am upset.

Second Period

• Well, godspeed Cayden Primeau!
• Artturi Lehkonen remains very good at hockey folks.
• Alright, time to actually kill this penalty!
• Hey drawing a penalty works too!
• Heck of a series of saves from Primeau there!
• Jake Evans not getting any kind of points after weaving through two zones like that makes me incredibly sad.
• Poor Joel Armia cannot buy a single break this season.
• I’ve been really impressed by Michael Pezzetta and Corey Schueneman in this game tonight, a lot of really smart heads up plays from both guys.
• That most certainly was not a penalty just a few days ago either, I don’t blame Mike Hoffman for being upset.
• Yeah that tracks, of course the Coyotes score.
• Nick Ritchie is dumber than a sack of hammers.
• COLE CAUFIELD WHAT A SHOT.
• COLE CAUFIELD WHAT A SHOT AGAIN.
• I cannot believe we have a game, but folks it’s gonna be a wild third period!

Third Period

• That is a great start to the period, let’s see what the Habs have left in their bag of tricks!
• Okay that is not what I had in mind Artturi.
• Great penalty kill, now go get another goal fellas.
• Listening to the Bell Centre slowly rise into a roar every time Caufield touches the puck warms my soul.
• The Habs are all over the Coyotes, win or lose it’s the exact kind of pushback you want after that first period.
• Alexander Romanov just absolutely destroyed Barrett Hayton my word.
• Brendan Gallagher has to find the back of the net before this is over right?
• This is an aggressive goalie pull from Martin St. Louis and I am here for it.
• Never mind that was anticlimactic
• I am oddly at peace with a loss like this, which is not what I expected a month ago.
• I also really wanted to see a Caufield hat trick, but there’s plenty of games left this year against bad teams.
• On to the next game!

3) This is the correct price

2) Some 14-13 games would be a lot of fun

1) Violating the rules of spacetime